


Almost Blue

by LeotheLionathefootofOrion



Series: Songs in the Key of Recovery [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Comforting Sam Winchester, Gabriel isn’t doing so well, Hurt Gabriel (Supernatural), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, SPOILERS FOR 13X13, Singing, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-18
Updated: 2018-02-18
Packaged: 2019-03-20 19:21:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13724334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeotheLionathefootofOrion/pseuds/LeotheLionathefootofOrion
Summary: Gabriel isn’t doing so well, and Sam isn’t about to let him go without a fight.





	Almost Blue

**Author's Note:**

> My small contribution to the angst-fest. I still can’t believe he’s back!
> 
>  
> 
> The songs mentioned are: Everyday I write the Book by Elvis Costello 
> 
> (https://youtu.be/V1d4r9awjKE)
> 
> : Almost Blue by Elvis Costello 
> 
> https://youtu.be/aeIPBQjJ2P0)

The voice filtered slowly through the halls of the bunker, soft and sad. It was singing, singing to no one in particular and for no real reason. And with no accompaniment, it became a sad song, where only the words mattered. A song that clearly meant something to the singer. Even as the voice became strong, it began to trail off into nothingness again, echoing slightly until nothing remained to let on that it had ever been there at all.

 

‘Chapter One: We didn't really get along.  
Chapter Two: I think I fell in love with you.  
You said you'd stand by me in the middle of Chapter Three  
But you were up to your old tricks in Chapters Four  
Five and Six.’

 

“You’ve got a really nice voice.” Sam murmured, standing in the doorway on the map room where Gabriel was sitting. He’d been sitting there quietly as he sang to himself, staring straight down at the floor. He looked up at Sam’s words, though.

“I’ve got perfect pitch. Don’t think I could sing off key if I tried.” Gabriel replied. He twisted his hands together and looked back at the floor. “What do you want?”

He looked better than he had when they’d first picked him up. The wounds were healed, mostly, except for the cuts around his mouth which seemed to be permanent. If Gabriel cared, he didn’t show any particular sign. He’d gained some weight, too, which was a mercy. It had been hard to look at him in the beginning, when he was so painfully thin. He still looked partly hollow even now. There was something about his sunken eyes which made Sam want to look away.

“How’re you doing?” He asked, still leaning in the doorway. Gabriel spread his hands out and shrugged. 

“I’m...” He seemed to have trouble coming up with an answer, which was nothing new. He hadn’t said much beyond ‘yes’ and ‘no’ ever since he’d been in the bunker - it was like multi syllabic words just couldn’t make it out of his mouth. In fact, the words within his singing made up the first complicated sentence Sam had heard him say. Gabriel kept bringing his hands up to his lips as though he expected to find the thread still knitted into his fresh.

Sam moved away from the doorway, still waiting for an answer. Gabriel looked at him helplessly and shrugged. “I’m ok.”

“Sitting here singing Elvis Costello and looking like the world’s about to end? Doesn’t seem like ‘ok’ to me.” Sam replied, tilting his head. Gabriel just shrugged and slowly rose from his seat. His legs were unsteady but he stood as tall as he could, chin slightly raised - a picture of weak defiance. Before he could leave the room, Sam put out a hand to gently stop him.

“I know you’re struggling. With talking. And everything else.” He said softly. Gabriel had flinched when Sam laid his hand on his arm. Now he started to pull away, shaking his head.

“You can’t go on like this.” Sam persisted, grabbing his wrist this time. Gabriel snarled and turned around to face him, free hand raised and ready to strike. “I can. And I will.” He growled. “Get out of my way.”

Sam released his wrist quickly and watched as Gabriel shrank away from him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He said placatingly, taking a step back. Gabriel shook his head, sharing down at his wrist where the marks of Sam’s fingers were fading to white. His lips were sealed as firmly as if the thread still held them together.

“I just want to help you.” Sam sighed. “I... I’ve been where you are now. Maybe I didn’t have it as bad. But I know what it’s like to be thrust back into the world when you’ve be trapped so long, you’ve forgotten the color of the sky.”

Gabriel’s eyes drifted up to Sam’s face and he blinked slowly. Sam took it as a sign to keep talking. “I know you have nightmares. I know things trigger you and make you panic. Believe me, I’ve been there. Part of me’s still there, actually.”

He reached out and took Gabriel’s hand, gently this time. Gabriel didn’t flinch, and he met Sam’s gaze. “I don’t know where to start. To get better.” He mumbled. His lips took time to form the words and he had to spit them out like they were choking him. 

Sam squeezed his hand gently. “Let me help you.” He led Gabriel to sit down again. “Sing to me. You can do that, can’t you?” Gabriel looked at him for a moment, then nodded. His hand crept in to hold Sam’s, small and cold. Sam didn’t move, didn’t speak, as Gabriel began to sing.

‘Almost blue  
Almost doing things we used to do  
There's a girl here and she's almost you  
Almost...’

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I really appreciate feedback.


End file.
